Choose how you listen:
Apple podcasts
Amazon Music
Spotify
Does this resonate?
For years, I believed leadership was about pushing harder, working longer, and showing up no matter how depleted I felt. It seemed like success demanded constant resilience—never slowing down.
But that old narrative, as my guest Jayne Warrilow shared, doesn’t create great leaders. It creates burnout. Isolation. Disconnection.
Jayne is an entrepreneur and thought leader, and founder of Sacr ed Changemakers. a global community that hosts a school of human consciousness. In our conversation on The Enlightened Executive, she opened up about her journey from overachieving workhorse to authentic, human-centered leader—and the leadership transformations that followed.
Her insights struck a deep chord. Here’s what we uncovered—and how you can apply it to your own leadership.
Why We Hide Our True Selves (And What It Costs Us)
Jayne’s early career was a masterclass in achievement. She worked nonstop. Led by sheer force of example. Powered through major life events—including childbirth—without missing a beat.
And underneath it all? She hid her deep, introverted, soulful side out of fear it would be seen as weakness.
The cost of that mask was enormous. She lost empathy for her team. She expected others to perform superhuman feats too. She built walls instead of trust.
The truth is: when we deny our full humanity, we can’t fully connect with the people we lead.
Action Step
Recognize the Masks.
Ask yourself: Where am I hiding parts of my story or feelings from my team?
Where am I setting an impossible example they feel pressured to match?
The Drumbeat of Authenticity: Listening to Your Soul
At some point, hiding stops working.
In her 40s, Jayne started hearing what she calls “the drumbeat of my soul”—a persistent voice urging her to live more truthfully.
What she discovered changed everything: her sensitivity and creativity weren’t flaws to be hidden. They were her greatest leadership strengths.
Immersing herself in philosophy and spiritual inquiry (including Viktor Frankl’s Man’s Search for Meaning) helped her realize vulnerability wasn’t a defect—it was the path to belonging, connection, and deeper impact.
Action Step
Start Your Own Inquiry.
- Explore books, podcasts, and thinkers that challenge your current definition of leadership success.
- Jayne recommends starting with Viktor Frankl’s Man’s Search for Meaning and Yes to Life in Spite of Everything.
Turning Hardship into Fuel for Growth – “Traumeaning”
Jayne coined a word I love: traumeaning—finding meaning through hardship.
She realized that we all deal with trauma-like situations. It isn’t rare, it’s universal. What matters is how we respond: either by staying trapped in old stories, or by reframing the experience into growth.
Years of therapy helped her untangle the mind stories—of unworthiness, of needing to be “perfect” to be loved—that shaped how she showed up as a leader.
And as she learned true self-empathy, she finally had the capacity to lead others with real understanding and care.
Action Step
Reframe Your Stories.
When you face a setback, pause and ask:
- What is this teaching me?
- How could this challenge fuel empathy, connection, or growth for myself—and for others?
Leading With Radical Honesty: Building Trust Through Shared Humanity
The best leaders aren’t superheroes. They’re human beings who model courage, openness, and resilience.
Jayne now practices radical honesty: telling her team when she’s struggling, when a family crisis needs her attention, when she’s simply having a hard day. Rather than derailing performance, this vulnerability deepens trust—and unlocks a different level of creativity and commitment.
The fear that being honest will lead to chaos? It’s unfounded. In fact,
Action Step
Try One Story.
At your next check-in, share a real, relatable moment when you struggled.
Ask: “Has anyone else felt this way?”
Watch how the dynamic shifts toward openness, trust, and deeper connection.
Embracing Your “Blurs”: Turning Your Supposed Weaknesses into Strengths
One of my favorite takeaways from Jayne’s journey is her idea of the “blurs”—the blessings and curses wrapped up in our strongest traits.
For Jayne, her sensitivity once felt like a curse.
Now, she sees it as the very wellspring of her creativity, empathy, and leadership power.
Instead of trying to eliminate the harder parts of her nature, she honors them—and builds healthy boundaries to manage their intensity.
Action Step
Own Your Blurs.
Identify one trait you’ve long viewed as a weakness.
Ask: How might this also be my secret strength?
What rituals or boundaries could help me harness the blessing side of it more fully?
What Else We Covered:
- The critical role of self-empathy before you can empathize with others
- Jayne’s new venture, Lifelines, and how sensory immersion can help leaders stay grounded
- Practical exercises for fostering authentic connection across teams and organizations
Final Takeaway: Leadership Starts When We Drop the Façade
If you take one thing from Jayne’s story, let it be this:
The leaders who change organizations—and lives—aren’t the ones who wear the perfect mask. They’re the ones who dare to show up, flaws and all, and lead with their whole selves.
This week, I challenge you:
- Drop one mask.
- Share one real moment.
- Start leading not just from your head—but from your heart.
If you’re ready to go deeper, listen to my full conversation with Jayne Warrilow on The Enlightened Executive.
Let’s lead the way—together.